Bully campaign mum told 'stop' (From thisisoxfordshire)

DO NOT GIVE UP

We went through exactly the same thing with Oxford School. It is no longer about the children and the bullying they have to endure, it is purely about protecting the teachers.

Even the County Council refused to acknowledge a problem and yet six months later removed the whole Governing body because of their failings in dealing with issues.

Schools in Oxfordshire have an epidemic of bullying and yet NOBODY with any real authority is prepared to stand up, be counted and deal with it.

Can the OM not post the Facebook link here so that your readers can view the page and judge for themselves?

Get the police involved, this bully's can be prosecuted for various charges. Call the police and get them to have a meeting with you and the Head and make your complaint official. Even if the kids are under 10 the parents can be prosecuted.

The governors should not be involved at this stage. They are way out of order sending this letter. I hope Governor Services will point this out to them.

Good luck to Ms Barson. When my son was at a primary school I too felt the school didn't do enough to help/support pupils deal with bullying. I was a bit reticient about pursing as I didn't want to make matters worse. Something I still regret. When he went to secondary school - I realised how much better they were at dealing with bullying problems. Primary schools need to take a far more proactive approach in this area, young children can be very emotionally damaged by all forms of bullying, parents need to be able to trust the school will take their concerns seriously.

By the way - the child who made my son's (& many others) lives a misery was eventually excluded from secondary school.

"How dare the governors threaten me with legal action for speaking my mind. What happened to free speech in this country?"

We do have free speech, but that goes hand in hand with the opportunity to libel and defame if what you say is not true.

This school seems to have always been like this 40 years ago my mother was bullied and they didnt do anythin about it told her she must leave the school instead. its appauling dont give up! Bullying is wrong and needs to be stoped!

thankyou for all your support. for those who wish to reveiw my page themselves, then please do request me n make your own judgements....... this isnt about me ita about all the children who are suffering at the hands of bullys each and every day they walk into school. how much more should our children have to endure this abuse???? especially when our children "do the right thing" in informing an adult, n still nothing is done for a week. would you not be irate slightly if it took you nearly 3 days to actually speak to the head????? i leave you to ponder this, and to also say my deepoest thanks to the oxford mail and its readers for your support, its wrong and we all know it.

LittleBrother wrote:
"How dare the governors threaten me with legal action for speaking my mind. What happened to free speech in this country?" We do have free speech, but that goes hand in hand with the opportunity to libel and defame if what you say is not true.

well little brother..... as ive already stated, if you wish to view my facebook page and all status's made by me, including the numerous parents comments. then please feel free to request me , i will accept you, then you can judge for yourself. i have nothing to hide and its not about me its about the children.........

Agree with the statement.

Bullying is most definitely an issue to be taken seriously but defamation and slander against the school and the governing body isn't the way to go about fixing it. Constructive criticsm should always be allowed though, and on any medium.

Richard MacKenzie wrote:
Can the OM not post the Facebook link here so that your readers can view the page and judge for themselves?

Agree

And the saddest thing of all is that when people need support from the teachers of their children they come up gainst a brick wall

I understand the difficulty when a child is being bullied and the parent's difficulty in sorting the problem. However comments made on Facebook are hardly likely to solve anything, they may grab attention and allow us to 'slag' people off: but in the long run these derogatory remarks will really get us nowhere.

I do understand the difficulty that Mrs Barson is suffering as the head teacher has been unable to meet with her. However if Mrs Barson was to constantly challenge her - through phone calls, letters, demanding to see the headteacher, in my opinion, is better than simply making comments on Facebook.

My experience of the school and the head teacher is that it is friendly and approachable. I feel disheartened to hear that a child is being bullied but I feel that facebook is not the right way to tackle this problem.

Agree with LittleBrother: the comments need to be actually true before you can defame someone.

Secondly, a letter from the board of govenors shows that the school is a tight knit community... they work together to make things better... Has Mrs Barson actually written to the board of governors? I would like to know that before I make any further comments about it.

Matters involving bullying should be dealt with internally in any institution. Expressing such intimate problems to the press only inflates problems.

Also why is there a repetition of people being unable to access this facebook group?

ta363 wrote:
I understand the difficulty when a child is being bullied and the parent's difficulty in sorting the problem. However comments made on Facebook are hardly likely to solve anything, they may grab attention and allow us to 'slag' people off: but in the long run these derogatory remarks will really get us nowhere. I do understand the difficulty that Mrs Barson is suffering as the head teacher has been unable to meet with her. However if Mrs Barson was to constantly challenge her - through phone calls, letters, demanding to see the headteacher, in my opinion, is better than simply making comments on Facebook. My experience of the school and the head teacher is that it is friendly and approachable. I feel disheartened to hear that a child is being bullied but I feel that facebook is not the right way to tackle this problem. Agree with LittleBrother: the comments need to be actually true before you can defame someone. Secondly, a letter from the board of govenors shows that the school is a tight knit community... they work together to make things better... Has Mrs Barson actually written to the board of governors? I would like to know that before I make any further comments about it.

i do respect what you have to say, but this isnt about facebook, this is just distracting from the issue at hand of the numerous bullys in the said school .yes i did make several complaints and attempts to see the headmistress. talking of which, are you and i talking about the same school???? if so are you on the board of governers????? facebook was my last resort. if you had seen my page then youd know, that i actually put out a plea to ask other parents if they had children whom were or had been bullied at said school.

oxford27 wrote:
Matters involving bullying should be dealt with internally in any institution. Expressing such intimate problems to the press only inflates problems. Also why is there a repetition of people being unable to access this facebook group?

the reason why this "group" is unaccessable is because its not a GROUP!!! it was my PERSONAL page.

SAMANTHA BARSON wrote:

ta363 wrote:
I understand the difficulty when a child is being bullied and the parent's difficulty in sorting the problem. However comments made on Facebook are hardly likely to solve anything, they may grab attention and allow us to 'slag' people off: but in the long run these derogatory remarks will really get us nowhere. I do understand the difficulty that Mrs Barson is suffering as the head teacher has been unable to meet with her. However if Mrs Barson was to constantly challenge her - through phone calls, letters, demanding to see the headteacher, in my opinion, is better than simply making comments on Facebook. My experience of the school and the head teacher is that it is friendly and approachable. I feel disheartened to hear that a child is being bullied but I feel that facebook is not the right way to tackle this problem. Agree with LittleBrother: the comments need to be actually true before you can defame someone. Secondly, a letter from the board of govenors shows that the school is a tight knit community... they work together to make things better... Has Mrs Barson actually written to the board of governors? I would like to know that before I make any further comments about it.

i do respect what you have to say, but this isnt about facebook, this is just distracting from the issue at hand of the numerous bullys in the said school .yes i did make several complaints and attempts to see the headmistress. talking of which, are you and i talking about the same school???? if so are you on the board of governers????? facebook was my last resort. if you had seen my page then youd know, that i actually put out a plea to ask other parents if they had children whom were or had been bullied at said school.

Did you try to make an attempt to contact the board of governors though? That is my question... We are talking about the same school (Rose Hill Primary School Oxford) and no, I am not on the board either. I just think, maybe, before going to facebook as a last resort there could have been other ways to address the situation- by trying to contact the governors. Although I understand your frustrations and your view that facebook was the only way to attract attention, I just feel that the governors could have been contacted? I know the board personally and feel that they are supportive and would have tried to help, but it's easy to say what should have been done in hind sight!

Says all about the arrogance of The headmistress and governers, they think they can bully and frighten 1 lady with a letter. But when the big boys get involved they sh!t themselves and run away, hence no comment. You should be ashamed and resign immediately.

ta363 wrote:

SAMANTHA BARSON wrote:

ta363 wrote: I understand the difficulty when a child is being bullied and the parent's difficulty in sorting the problem. However comments made on Facebook are hardly likely to solve anything, they may grab attention and allow us to 'slag' people off: but in the long run these derogatory remarks will really get us nowhere. I do understand the difficulty that Mrs Barson is suffering as the head teacher has been unable to meet with her. However if Mrs Barson was to constantly challenge her - through phone calls, letters, demanding to see the headteacher, in my opinion, is better than simply making comments on Facebook. My experience of the school and the head teacher is that it is friendly and approachable. I feel disheartened to hear that a child is being bullied but I feel that facebook is not the right way to tackle this problem. Agree with LittleBrother: the comments need to be actually true before you can defame someone. Secondly, a letter from the board of govenors shows that the school is a tight knit community... they work together to make things better... Has Mrs Barson actually written to the board of governors? I would like to know that before I make any further comments about it.

i do respect what you have to say, but this isnt about facebook, this is just distracting from the issue at hand of the numerous bullys in the said school .yes i did make several complaints and attempts to see the headmistress. talking of which, are you and i talking about the same school???? if so are you on the board of governers????? facebook was my last resort. if you had seen my page then youd know, that i actually put out a plea to ask other parents if they had children whom were or had been bullied at said school.

Did you try to make an attempt to contact the board of governors though? That is my question... We are talking about the same school (Rose Hill Primary School Oxford) and no, I am not on the board either. I just think, maybe, before going to facebook as a last resort there could have been other ways to address the situation- by trying to contact the governors. Although I understand your frustrations and your view that facebook was the only way to attract attention, I just feel that the governors could have been contacted? I know the board personally and feel that they are supportive and would have tried to help, but it's easy to say what should have been done in hind sight!

no i didnt contact the board if govoners . its not them thats responsable for my sons safety and care whilst in rosehill primary from 9am -3pm. that is the role of the headmistress is it not? also when your sent people you dont even know to "deal" with the issue , that made me more irate. id asked to see mrs mortimer from the start and had asked specifically for her, not the school manager , nor the senco , nor another person whose title im un-sure of. surely this is down to the headmistress. also may i say that whilst my son was enduring the abuse at the hands of a bully , for a week. in the same said week, the school was promoting a anti-bullying campaign. if that is not hypocracy what is??? you then wonder why im not happy with the outcome of the meeting????? bully kept in at all breaks(old detention), and helped to make better choices???? what who is gna be their next victim??? or what theyre gna do next????

Pierre My wrote:
Says all about the arrogance of The headmistress and governers, they think they can bully and frighten 1 lady with a letter. But when the big boys get involved they sh!t themselves and run away, hence no comment. You should be ashamed and resign immediately.

thankyou pierre!!!! if only i had time to tell you the full story, of how people were "persuaded" to come and talk to me and find out what i was up to....... oh yes this situation was not followed totally by proceedure. i put my hands up fully that i didnt follow it to the rule but as a parent youll do what has to be done for your children, thats what parents do.

Totally agree with Mrs Barson, It was her choice to do it on her OWN facebook page therefore its down to her what she has to say on it. Also the head mistress is the one held responsible for this problem, if she isnt then what is the point of her at the school? Its her job to make sure the school runs smoothly and that any issues children/parents or staff may have are dealt with. Im so glad Mrs Barson came forward as many other parents are to afraid of consequences, if this was your child would you be ok with getting ignored day in day out when all you want to do is make school life better for your children??

thankyou thankyou thankyou yummy mummy!!!! finally someone singing the same song as me!!!! it was my own personal page, and what i said was not in any way deffamatry to the headmistress as facebook proved.my son loves school and cant get enough to absorb,so when your son starts to fein sickness as he doesnt want to go to school. you then know this is a problem. i wasnt sent home any incident reports , yet my son told adults??? yet they are quick enough to send them home when its your child that done something wrong,so surely i am intitled to say be a tad upset, yes???? yet again today i had another parent whose child is being bullied approach me. all i want is an enviroment where my sons feel safe, and are able to learn and be happy. maybe if there was more structured play in breaks , which is where most of the bullying takes place????

It's a shame that kids are taught not to fight bullies back.

I teach mine to defend themselves but I see so often how doing so is detrimental to self.

I remember when I was at secondary school (many moons ago now). There were these two girls in my year group, they would always pick on this much smaller, weaker, but smarted kid. They did this for years. Cutting a long story short, one day, this nerdy girl decided to fight back (I guess she discovered death-metal music or something). Totally unprovoked, she kicked one of the girls right in the fanny. She kicked her so hard that this bully needed several stitches and now walks like John Wayne.

Funny enough, the bullies stopped.

I'm not condoning fanny kicking, but sometimes I do think kids should be encouraged to stand up for themselves instead of the parents, PTA, teachers, govenors, social workers et cetera 'asking' them politely to stop their bullying ways.

Fight for your rights.

No need to thank me, im just gald someone has finally done what was needed! I just hope this get resolved.. For you, your children and all the other families that have to put up with this behaviour! and Sue mortimer... shame on you!!